My word, this is going to be a long post! Please bear in mind that I didn't some of the most obnoxious recent episodes, so I'm only putting the ones I have seen in.
1) 'Rose' (s1). Thinking about the goodwill this got on airing is itself annoying. It's such a lightweight episode in every conceivable way - the Doctor is miscast and emasculated immediately, the dialogue annoying, the ending is pure 'is that it' and the tone totally diluted compared to the Autons' original appearance with Pertwee. I was just glad to see the show had a warmer reception at the time than the TV Movie did, and when Eccles quit it looked like it might be the last hurrah! If only...
2) 'The Idiot's Lantern' (s2). Hideous overacting by Tennant, Jamie Foreman (never the most subtle of actors), Lipman and Cook. It's like everyone's performing in slow motion! Tennant's Doctor seems so petulant here, and the image would stick.
3) 'Love & Monsters' (s2). At least Peter Kay had the decency to voice regret over his appearance in this. As well as the mean-spirited satire it's an obvious attempt to ape Buffy's deconstruction and off-centre story-telling (such as in 'The Zeppo', where a disregarded Xander becomes the unlikely hero). However that episode had charm, wit and class!
4) 'Fear Her' (s2). For the reasons provided by Maxil. The child acting is dreadful and Huw Edwards' is worse.
5) 'The Sound Of Drums/Last Of The Time Lords' (s3). After Jacobi's masterclass in the strong 'Utopia' this is appalling on all levels. Simm is so bad he almost deserves an award. Jesus Doctor, made-up plot fixes, terrible music - the template for all the bad finales to come.
6) 'The End Of Time' (Special). Davies & Simm now turn the iconic villain into a kind of bollocksed-up Mr Benn (not Mr Bean!). Cannibal Hoodie Master, Dragged-up Master, Agent Smith-style Master - then there's Tennant's attempts to do pathos and the interminable goodbye scene. Compare & contrast with Pertwee/Tom's dignified farewells!
7) 'The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe' (Special). All of Moffat/Smith's promise had gone down the toilet by this point, and we just had a parade of over-familiar comedians - Smarmstrong, Bailey, Weir - coming on instead. Nu Who needs no excuse to be even more syrupy and insubstantial, even at Xmas! And the mention of Androzani just makes it worse...
8) 'The Rings Of Akhaten' (s7). Smith's 'come ON then!' speech is hideous, and even the fawning media seemed to have had enough by this point - he was starting to get the blame as much as the showrunners. Clara was dying so often (and continued to) she was starting to resemble Kenny from South Park!
9) 'The Day Of The Doctor' (Special). Pointless runaround, with Tennant bundled in to boost the flagging ratings and Hurt wasted. The Zygon here was an insult to one of the most menacing, well-designed aliens the original series ever created. Tom's cameo was initially uplifting but ultimately just empty fan-service, like the whole episode.
10) 'Robot Of Sherwood' (s8). Apart from Ben Miller's 'Survival-era Ainley Master-esque' performance it's horrendous. The scene with Capaldi as prisoner with Robin is terrible, the worst I've ever seen him.
11) 'Kill The Moon' (s8). After 3 completely forgettable episodes this unscientific nonsense had a ridiculous denouement. The egg's proportions, the shuttle landing effects, the Big Brother-style phone in with the 'public vort!', as Marcus Bentley would call it.
12) 'In The Forest Of The Night' (s8). Like KtM was originally for Smith's Doctor, this truly wretched fairytale guff feels like the show hadn't developed in a new direction for Capaldi yet. Utterly lacking in menace, yet another deux ex machina ending and a generally pointless feel.
13) 'Death In Heaven' (s8). I think we all know why I've included this! Even the credits got f*cked-up, and almost impossibly disastrous in every regard. I've just read on wikipedia "The episode received positive reviews, with critics praising its writing, direction, and acting. Gomez was consistently highly praised in reviews, with many calling her a highlight of the eighth series." Even the Master couldn't hynotise people into thinking that!
14) 'The Magician's Apprentice/The Witch's Familiar' (s9). I've enjoyed a few of the Dalek episodes since 2005, particularly when it's just one of them (and even the Manhattan-based story, at times) but this is the low point. Crying Davros, ridiculous escape scenes, terrible CGI, and the mighty pepperpots defeated by sewage. Moffat's storytelling at its worst.
15) 'The Girl Who Died' (s9). Awful dialogue (particularly for Capaldi), comedy vikings, ridiculous villains. The critics apparently found this episode hilarious, which just says it all! It's odd how I don't remember the Doctor ever needing to 'speak baby' in Classic Who...
16) 'Hell Bent' (s9). Just dreadful. The acting from the supporting cast is at an all-time low (the Gallifrey guard being one such example), the sex/race-changing General, the 'Lesbian Tardis' at the end and yet more cheated death/consequences for the protagonists. What on Earth is the point of half of these Moffat episodes!?
17) 'The Doctor Falls' (s9). By this point I couldn't even be in the same room as the show, which makes reviewing it difficult. Simm seemed more restrained and more menacing, Gomez much better too, but to hear the raving reviews this got makes me wonder whether I'm mad or the showrunners are!
I couldn't watch it from 'Twice Upon A Time' onwards. Still, it's not as if anything daft could have happened in that episode too, could it!?
